Such a poser

This last week I decided it would be fun to explore the Ottawa University campus, as I have never been there before. When I got there, I decided the game would be to fit in as much as I could. To blend in, if you will. I got on a bus that said it would take me there, and was on my way.

I could tell which stop to get off at mostly based on the amount of young people wearing backpacks who decided it was time to exit. I followed. A 20-something man with a green backpack was right in front of me, so I followed him off of the bus, through a tunnel and into a building on campus. It turned out to be the education building. Cool, I thought. I could totally pass as an education student.

Turns out it was harder to blend in to a place I had never been than I thought. I wandered around the building trying to find something interesting to do without looking like I didn't know where I was going, but I couldn't find ANYTHING but a little hallway with a lot of couches that people were studying on, and being REALLY quiet. I put my backpack down on one of the couches and pretended to be looking for something in my backpack, as I glanced around to look for a staircase, or SOMETHING interesting. Couldn't see a thing. I got up and left. Pshhh, education was boring.

I walked into the next building, which was the university center. Here we go! First off they were having a poster sale, which just brought me right back to my university days. Scouring through posters, trying to decide on one new one for my room, which I would hate by the following year and throw away anyway. Buying three other posters that were mediocre but on SALE for my family members as part of their Christmas presents for the following year, which they would eventually throw away as well. Then there was a display of a ton of clubs trying to advertise for their particular activity. A lot of flyers were pushed in my face, and then one very sweet lady asked me if I would like her flyer, which was refreshing. She was part of the meditation club, and they had a free meditation class happening later on. I gladly took one, and decided I would stop by later. As I wandered through hallways, I was stopped by a young man trying to survey University students. My plan to blend was working too well! I was tempted to go along with it, but right away I felt guilty and told him I didn't actually go there. He looked very confused, and just kind of stumbled off backwards. I think he thought I was lying to avoid him. Ah well.

As I made my way into the next building I saw some students wandering into a class room and I was feeling adventurous so I followed them in. They were heading into a class that had already started and was showing a film in mandarin. (I think...) It was interesting! From what I gathered, it was about a young girl who was forced into smuggling some kind of drugs by a group of scary-looking men. Why a language course (I'm assuming that's what it was) would choose to show this movie, is beyond me. I snuck out before the movie was over, and continued on my way. I quickly found the library and INSTANTLY started to look up Canadian playwrights, and off I went. I ended up reading "The Clockmaker" by Stephen Massicotte, a playwright I love, and found it to be quite an interesting tale. I tried to get onto the wireless internet, however, it required a student number and password. For a few minutes I glanced around the room and saw one new person just logging on, I thought maybe if I walked behind them I could try to see it, haha, but that seemed ridiculous so I gave up.

It was time for the meditation class after all. I made my way back to the center, and wandered up to the 3rd floor looking for 301, and could not find it for the life of me. I circled the floor three times, and finally asked some girls if they knew. They told me to circle the floor and look. I circled AGAIN, because I wanted them to feel they had been useful in their advice, and then gave them a shrug as I made my way down to the first floor. Maybe it had been 103 instead, I thought, and looked for 103. It was locked. Alright, I give up.

In my experience, if something doesn't quite work out, there is usually something much more interesting to come. And it did. As I wandered outside once more, I started to hear a bunch of dogs bark, and was way too curious to pass it up. I found a tiny winter festival happening behind one of the buildings with a dog sled and festivities going on, and french canadian AWFUL pop music blasting. It was GREAT!

I got in a line up, because it seemed like the thing to do, and as I made my way to the front some girl at the desk asked me what year I was in, I spouted out "first year, arts." She didn't bat an eye (of course) ticked off her list and handed me a pile of coupons. I got into the next line and in a few minutes had a free beavertail and snow-maple lollipop in hand, and was next up for a ride in the dogsleds! 

The dog sled ride was lame. Just once in a circle around a small park (and I've had some pretty awesome dog sled rides before, so it just seemed silly!) Anyway, it was still hilarious!

I devoured the beavertail, and decided that after a successful day as a fake student, I was done. I found my way onto a bus, and headed off, feeling just a tiny bit mischievous, and with a little cinnamon and sugar sprinkled on my mitts.

Love and kindness all.

Harry Met Sally Theorizing

-->

Today I wanted to wander aimlessly. Sometimes I just get that way. The way my day worked out, however, was that I only had a few hours to do so. I decided to allow myself to spend the hour and a half that I had to kill in Ottawa by hopping on a bus and seeing where it took me, and going into some random place.  I knew what direction I was heading, so it wasn’t as awesome as it sounds, but I didn’t know what to expect. I took a bus South into old Ottawa, and got off at a random stop, and wandered into a pub called “Patty’s Pub.” It was lovely.

I sat at a table right next to a fire, had a tea, and a really sweet server who told me all about how she wanted to be an actor someday, but right now she was a journalist, haha. I ordered the only think on the menu that I have never tried in my little life, which was a potato pancake dish that was special to this particular pub. They called it “Boxty” and I had the one with salmon, sundried tomatoes and some kind of sauce on it. It was delightful. And huge.

As I allowed my very full stomach to digest, and sipped on some tea, I couldn’t help but start to notice the interesting conversation of the two people sitting behind me. It was a man and a woman, who I immediately assumed were a couple when I walked in, but now were discussing what the man should do to confront his wife about how much money she is spending regularly. I found myself instantly shocked, not because of the conversation, but the relationship. I was puzzled by how blunt they were with each other, how fearlessly they would question each other, and knowing that they were not a couple. I couldn’t wrap my brain around it, until the gentleman slipped out “you know, they live right near mom.” Oh! They were brother and sister!

This realization was interesting to me on a few levels. Number one: I never had a brother, and it is a relationship that I have never fully understood. Number two: Why is it that I assume women and men can only have candid and real conversations when they are a couple, or siblings? This made me reflect on my friendships with men. I think on some level I have always bought into the whole “When Harry Met Sally” reasoning that women and men can’t really be friends because the sex stuff always gets in the way, except that I agree with Harry’s alteration to this rule, which was that when both parties are in serious relationships it can also work. I would have to say one party in a serious relationship does it as well (and, of course, if one of them is gay, it also works.) I know this because as soon as I find out a man is in a relationship, I find myself instantly feeling more at ease with them. I am allowed to be friendly without them taking it to mean something else. There are, of course, exceptions to this rule that have developed through the years, but the majority of cases do follow it.

I think what it really boils down to is this: I am so afraid of giving someone the wrong impression (ie: leading them on in some way) that I put up a subconscious (and sometimes conscious) wall. The funny thing about this is that I sometimes do it before I even have a chance to decide if I might actually be possibly interested in someone. It's also a pretty good barrier for me, to keep me from developing feelings for someone in case they turn out to only be interested in being friends.

Now, I have a new goal. My new goal is to break this rule, and allow my friendships to blossom with the men in my life without assuming that they will want to sleep with me, or that it has to go anywhere near that direction. Also, if it does, and I am not interested, it’s not the end of the world to say “I think we’re more buddy material than dating material.” On the other hand, if it does, and I am the party interested, and the other party is not, I will live. It requires a lot more bravery to go with the flow, and have a friendship without planning where it is going, but I think I am ready to do it.                                                    

"I'll have what she's having"

Love and kindness all.

The bald soprano

Warning that this post may fall into the TOO MUCH INFORMATION category, so I suggest you stop reading if you might become uncomfortable. You are fully warned.

Before starting my little adventure in Ottawa, I didn't get a chance to get my regular bikini sugaring done at my usual place. I didn't really care all that much, until I saw that there was only one dressing room, and we would all be changing together, at which point I began to feel a little self conscious, so I figured I would just find a place in Ottawa. I set out researching places and came across one that was not too far from where I was staying that seemed to get good online reviews and booked an appointment.

I found my way down there without getting lost (woowhoo!) and waited in the very pretty waiting room for my turn. When I went in the room it looked a little bit different, but not alarmingly so, a paper-covered table in the middle of the room with a towel on it was waiting for me. As a little Korean woman ushered me in, she asked me to get undressed and cover myself with the towel. Now, usually I get a little pair of paper underwear to put on as well, but I didn't see any, so I asked her if I should keep my underwear on. "No, no, all off" She answered. Okay, this was going to be different!

I waited on the table with a little towel covering everything important. The little Korean woman came back in and got to work, and I started chattering as to distract myself from guessing when the pain would start. First off, I have to say, thank god I'm not that shy, 'cause she was lifting my legs up and poking around all over the place. As I babbled about the show I was doing and what kinds of things I want to do while I'm here, I didn't notice that she had taken off a little bit more than a usual bikini... and I paused my babble to try to figure out how to ask what exactly was going on... at the exact same time, she suddenly realized it too. "Oh no" she said. Not exactly the best thing to hear... "I started to do a brazillian" Well that makes a lot more sense. "Do you want me to finish it up or just do the bikini on the other side?" It was a pretty funny question given that one way would leave me completely lopsided, and so I figured it was better to just let her finish the thing.

Overall, there's really the same kind of pain no matter what kind of wax/sugaring you get, it just lasts a little longer, the more you get taken off! Luckily (very luckily) my lady was ridiculously quick and had been doing it for 15 years, so she knew exactly what she was doing. That is key. The other very funny moment came when she asked me "Do you want me to do underneath?" I had no idea what she was talking about. "I'm sorry, what?" "Under, you know, under" I was still puzzled "your bum?" Oh, now I got it. "No, nope, I'm good! Thanks anyway" I was very quick to pipe out.

A little special cream later and I was done! It wasn't as bad as I would have expected, but we'll see how I am doing a little later on today... Have to say though ladies, I dunno why you do it! I feel like a prepubescent girl. I don't think I'll be doing the full monty again. I'll stick with my little bikini waxes, thank you!

The way home was also a really interesting adventure. I ran into a person I knew and was happily chatting as a man from the back of the bus walked in between us, looked me in the eye and said "You smell bad, take a shower" and moved to the front of the bus and sat down. I didn't know what to respond with so I said "Oh, okay." And watched as he told the man next to him that I smelled bad and waved his hand in front of his nose.

I have to admit that for about thirty seconds I wondered if maybe I did smell. As some of you might recall from a previous post about deodorant, I am a little self conscious about smells. I knew I put on deodorant just before I left so that couldn't be it. Perhaps he could smell the cream or something? For those thirty seconds I was sure that everyone at the front of the bus was looking at me, and thinking I smelled bad. It was a paranoia I haven't felt probably since middle school. Gosh, it is such a horrible feeling to think everyone is making fun of you! Anyway, it was just a very crazy man, I soon discovered as everyone around him in turn moved seats as far away from him as they could get, and with every move, he would point his middle finger at them until they saw it.

When I had reached my stop, I could see from my peripheral that he was pointing his middle finger at me the entire time I waited for the bus to stop, but I refused to give him the satisfaction of letting him know I had seen it, until I was on the sidewalk safely off the bus, as which point I flashed him a giant grin, in a "Kill em with kindness" fashion.

Oh, just a regular day in good ol' Ottawa!

Love and Kindness all.